Ah....it is that time again. I have once again been checking my blog almost daily to see if I have updated, but I'm always saddened to see that I haven't...so today is the today. Or more accurately: tonight is the night.

But, the only problem is that I have no idea what to write about. Here goes:

I have been listening to a ton of Mumford & Sons lately. (go listen to "Awake My Soul" if you've never heard them). Music is a big part of my life, and often I remember times in my life by remembering what I listened to during that time. And, after I went through my disgust with "Christian" music phase, I pretty much just chose to listen to secular music. Quickly, I stumbled upon Sufjan Stevens, and I realized there is quality music with lyrics that points toward something higher. And, I still like Sufjan, but this summer I started listening to Mumford. Not only is their music folksy and passionate, but the lyrics are just breathtaking. Unlike "worship" music often played in Protestant churches, Mumford portray emotions that are much deeper, and perhaps more real than the emotions portrayed by worship songs. Questioning of God and humanity and injustice...maybe a less polite kind of worship, and yet a more honest kind of worship.

I've been feeling a wide array of emotions lately, and I usually try to pretend that emotions don't mean much to me, but I learning to see the importance of them.
I'm excited about the future. About things like backpacking this weekend, and thanksgiving break with new friends, but also about things MUCH further in the future...ahh, there's just so much life to be had!
I'm also nervous and frightened for the future. Nervous about...well, everything. But, then I remember that everything is going to work out as it should. I'm not worried, I just get these anxious butterflies in my belly that make me kind of excited and nervous at once!
I am feeling so much gratitude for what I have had this entire year: the people surrounding me and the place I have been so graciously allowed to live for a year of my life
I am scared to leave this place and the people I have grown to love over the past 11 months. A new place is nerve-wrecking for me. But, hey, I know when I am uncomfortable, there is room for growth.

My faith is being restored after quite some time of questioning and struggling.

and it's good.