I've been thinking about what these past few months have meant to me quite a bit lately as there are only 12 days left in the semester. (Actually I should have been thinking about final paper topics instead) I am so pleased with the friendships that have begun this semester. There are a couple people I can't imagine not being friends with the rest of my life. Then there are the people I have liked being with this semester and we have connected in some way or another, but I will probably never be good friends with them. Then there are the people who I didn't really connect with, but may in the future...put probably not. And lastly, there are the people I connected with at the beginning of the semester thinking we would be good friends, and yet our friendship is more or less meaningless now...and that makes me sad, but so is life, I guess...

One thing I've noticed from this semester is the lack of meaningful, deep conversations I have taken part in. Other people keep saying that meaningful conversations have been an important part of the past few months, but I don't feel that way at all. Luckily, I think I understand why. Nearly all of my beliefs I have ever held have been destroyed, challenged, and questioned. Some have been rebuilt time and again, but I am almost afraid to formulate opinions because of the possibility that they could be completely ruined once again. And that makes me seem really cowardly...but I guess that is more or less what has been stopping me. My contribution to class discussion has been nearly non-existent, and my ability to formulate opinions and passionate arguments has been...stunted, I guess.

There is so much going on in my mind and so much questioning and doubting, there hasn't been nearly enough time for the formulation of opinion regarding all that is being questioned. Then again, I feel like I haven't connected with the people well enough that I could have meaningful conversations with...and again, that makes me quite sad.